http://i072.radikal.ru/1006/82/e651fbee36c1.png
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I think the focal needs to be resized some more. So far this is the best text I have seen you utilized. Still needs work on but its your best. Use it in a more simpler fashion. The piece needs more color and the smudging is not good. Needs more blending, smudging and texture. Work on your composition, lighting and colors.
