Im here to tell a joke

[weasel]

Here is a very funny joke, in poor taste. I tell it to everyone, so I thought I would tell it to you all.

So, there are these three girls and their father. The father is sitting in the kitchen when the first daugter comes in and says, "Daddy, why am I named Violet?". The father says, "Well, the first thing that happened to you when you were born was a violet petal fell on your head." Then the second daughter comes in and says "Daddy, why am I named Rose?" And the father says, "Well, the first thing that happened to you when you were born was a rose petal fell on your head." Then the third daugter comes and says "Aggggggguuuulllmenfdthsfsd!" And the father says, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"

It is a lot funnier with the proper timing, but I hope you all enjoyed it. If any of you are from the Human Rights Movement, I expect an angry letter. Cheers!

[MetalSkin]

This guy walks into a bar with a steering wheel hacking out of his pants.

The bartender is quite amazed at this and says to the guy "hey mate, you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants".

The guy looks down at the steering wheel and sighs, saying "yeah i know mate, it's driving me nuts".

[weasel]

LOLOLOLOLOL! Points to MetalSkin! Anyone else have a good joke?

[Illegalx17]

Hah metal, i've heard that one. OK howwabout this.

OK, so your driving on your flapjack, when the cellfone goes but the doghouse needs fixing. Three axles to the inning and the out doesn't count. How many oranges?

The answer is of course:

NO! Fish don't Have ears!!!

[MetalSkin]

riiiiiiight... doesn't that belong in the abstract area???

Three peanuts walk into a bar, one was a salted.

[weasel]

I have heard that one. It still doesnt make sense. Its almost as bad as the similar one:

Q. How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A. Fish, because ice cream has no bones!

[MetalSkin]

Q. What do you call three blonds lined up ear to ear?

A. A wind tunnel!

[Dick]

Q: Why Iraque loose the war with usa?

A: cause, with soviet machines, they took also soviet tactic: step back and wait on winter :lol:

[weasel]

So three girls are running from the cops, since they just stole some cash. There is a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. While running they notice a barn and decide to hide in there. The redhead hides with the cows, the brunette with the chickens, and the blonde hides in a potato sack. The police come in and go over to the cows, "Anyone there?" The redhead calls back, "Moo, moo". So the police move over to the chicken coop, "Anyone there?"
Brunette, "Cluck, cluck cluck"
Police, "Okay, anyone in the potato sack?"
Blonde, "Po-tae-to...po-tae-to!"

[Illegalx17]

a dyslexic man walks into a rab