Hahah this one is to take the piss out of our own town.. for the slightly more pikey / farmer / wiltshire sounding people.
*farmer accent*
I can't read, and i can't write
BUt that don't really matter
Cause i come down from swindon town
and i can drive my tratterr!
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Or you can have the last paragraph as
Cause i got a sheep and i got a cow,
and i can drive my tratter