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  1. #1

    Default Sound Of Battle.

    You stand at the mouth of the cave, listening, waiting, and watching.
    Long you wait, long you listen, long you watch
    Seeing nothing, hearing nothing
    Your hopes start to climb, you turn to retreat
    But then you hear it, a break in the silence
    You are struck with cold fear as you hear a faint, low-pitched sound
    Bouncing off of the high hills
    Resonating in the valleys

    Back to your post you dash
    The dull thud, thud of the orc war drums grows ever louder
    At the ready you stand, axe in hand, sword at side
    Still the drums pound, thud, thud, thud
    You grip your axe more tightly; beads of sweat run down your forehead
    Far ahead, war-horn sounds, they are getting closer
    Answering back, someone behind you blows their own horn
    The clear, high-pitched note travels far
    The beat momentarily stops
    But soon it begins again
    Thud, thud, thud, ever closer

    You see a cloud of dust ascending over the hill ahead of you
    Long, sparking, spear tips shine through the dust
    They grow closer
    Now you can hear war-cries mixed in with the drums
    You flinch at every beat, but still stand strong
    The company of orcs passes the crest of the hill
    Not long now…..

    No more than a few furlongs separate you
    Volleys of arrows begin pouring toward you
    Some fall, but the losses are slim
    An answering volley of arrows is thrown back at the orcs
    small losses for them
    For minutes the volleys pass back and forth
    Many are slain, but many more still are still standing

    The first battalion charges
    You hear the harsh cries of the orcs ahead
    The strong voices of the men at your side
    There is a clash of arms
    Axe-heads thud against wooden shields
    Or was it enemy’s skulls
    Spears clang into comrade’s armor
    They scream as they fall
    Stray arrows Twang into trees at the side
    For many hours the noise continues
    Clash, Thud, Twang
    Many screams are heard
    Many lay slain

    Then alas, the clamor subsides
    A cheer rises up
    You and your companions exchange weak smiles
    You are tired, and wounded
    But the enemy fallen

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Wiltshire.England
    Posts
    6,351

    Default

    Nice. Few tiny grammatical errors
    "you grip your axe more tightly"
    - you grip your axe tighter
    - your grip on the axe tightens
    etc

    " Resonating in the valleys"
    -Resonating through the valleys

    The last stanza ( oooh correct terminology ftw ) is wicked s'probs my favourite of the poem


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Massachusetts, USA
    Posts
    688

    Default

    I like this, I could picture t in my mind and it was like I was there

    XBOX Live Gamertag: Merc 106




  4. #4

    Default

    I love it, just like a short story, but with less detail :P Poems aren't my thing i generally end up going off on thoughts of short stories themselves which end in chaos and misunderstanding in myself, or losing the idea all together. I'll stick to reading em


    but hm...
    i think
    Many are slain, but many more still are still standing
    should be "but many more still are standing"
    or "but many more are still standing"

    or maybe i just think those sound better? idk.
    Last edited by EasyMeat; 07-03-2007 at 10:19 PM.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    379

    Default

    Ya, I was visualizing the hillside with the spears shining in the light.

    You're a good writer.

    I look forward to reading more of your work

    "Judge a man by his questions,
    not his answers."
    -Voltaire




  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Location
    Pittsfield MA
    Posts
    56

    Default

    Very nice. I love the imagery used in this. I had no trouble visualizing this. You, my friend, are an amazing writer.
    [Latest]





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